Thursday, June 18, 2009

I Was A Teenage* DM (Part 1)

Well, as Wilson Phillips might have said it: I got myself into my own mess.

It wasn't enough any more to simply be the PC in someone else's universe. No. I wanted the power for myself. And now I'm terrified.

It started at one of the games that Reis and I attend on a Monday night. Reis (He of the wonderful Geek Orthodox blog) would wait for a lull in the action inside Todd's (smallish) apartment to take a smoke break, and often I'd follow him outside for some fresh air and a brief escape from the goings-on inside.

Reis (puffing contemplatively, one eye squinted almost shut): "You know what I'd like to get to do, just once? Honest-to-goodness dungeon crawl.

Ryan: "Reis, do you have to blow smoke directly into my face?"

Reis: "But Todd has been clear from the start. He hates dungeon crawls."

Ryan: "Yup. that's what he said. Umm...could you not flick your ashes onto my clothes? I mean, I wouldn't say anything, but it's like you're aiming directly at..."

Reis: "You know what else? I never played genuine D&D rules. That would be awesome."

Ryan: "*cough*"

Reis: "Hey. Here's an idea. We should start up our own campaign. Go old-school. Get some homies together and just do some real grinding. Man, that would be hella sweet."

Ryan: "Well, I guess I could download a pre-made game of the you have any friends that might want to play?"

Reis: "Nah, maybe I can think of a guy. I'll ask him. See what he says. Why don't you just take care of it?"

Ryan: "You mean, come up with people who want to play D&D with us? Or do you mean-"

Reis: "I mean, take care of it. Make it happen. You do the hard work, and I show up and have a good time. What, are you stupid, or just hard of hearing?"

Ryan: "What? No! I can hear perfectly well-"

Reis: "Great. Fantastic. Let me know when everything's ready. In the meantime, hold out your hand."

Ryan: "Hold out my...why?"

Reis: "Do you see an ashtray anywhere, bitch?"

*(not really a teenager)


  1. Yep, that sounds pretty accurate. But if I remember correctly, I put the cigarette out in your eye.

    Now stop writing on your blog AND FINISH PREPARING FOR THE GOD DAMN GAME!